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Imagine this

L Ron Hubbard was a broke Science Fiction writer, with only an electric typewriter to his name. He wasn't even a particulary good science fiction writer, down there in the sludges of the pulps.

One day, he wrote a book and got a whole bunch of people fascinated with his observations, all of which he said were "scientific fact." You can admire his chutzpah: He was worth around $ 450 million at the time of his death.

Too bad not a single one of his words was true. And if he hadn't been so obsessed with collecting money and keeping secrets, he could have had it all: Money, fame, tax exemptions, adoring followers.

But things always seemed to be tumbling down on his head, and his paranoia got worse and worse by the day.

His paranoia was one of many things that outlived him.

And that's probably why you're reading this page.

Welcome to the Strange and Awesomely Awful world of Scientology!

This site has not been updated since August 1995. That's more than a decade ago! Despite this, it's pretty well known around the web and still contains much useful, and often humourous, information about the Church of Scientology and its curious denizens.

Why was this site not updated? Do I feel fear for what the Church could do to my immortal thetans, or at least what their lawyers could do? Well, actually, no. The truth is that I woke up one morning and realized that being anti-Scientology was just as time-consuming and life-altering as being in the cult itself. So I started devoting my time to bigger and better things.

However, I've decided to take a day to wander down memory lane and give more emphasis to my own writings, and the best of what others have done, so that visiting this site is a better experience.

My writings and some related resources I helped create

David in the Lion's Den: I visit the Mother Lode Scientology org in Los Angeles, and come back with Freedom. [Written 26 June 1995]

The ARS Players FAQ, a description of the major faces on alt.religion.scientology. My own writing, last updated 25 July 1995, with more on the infamous Chris Miller, and a Courtesy rating for all Scientology posters.

The ARS Tactics FAQ describes some of the odder tactics used by both pro and anti-CoS posters. Included is information on Encheferation, Dead Agenting and all sorts of other fun things. Last updated 22 July 1995

The Biased Journalism Archive, Shelley Thomson's excellent articles on the Dennis Erlich case and other matters. Last updated 24 December 1995, with Issue 6.

The alt.religion.scientology Terminology FAQ, by Martin Hunt. This version includes hyperlinks created by a program I wrote designed to make the dictionary more user friendly. [Last update: 8 June 1995]

Deana Holmes' History of the CoS attack on the net

Finally updated! Don't have enough time to read all of alt.religion.scientology? Check out Rod Keller's weekly ARS Summaries [Last updated August 1995]. Also check out his comprehensive Scientology FAQ for New Readers

Last updated: Wednesday, 2 August 1995
New posts added through circa 31 July 1995

Note: My apologies for the very slow updates to this page; I had a major crisis in my system this month, and that took up virtually all my time and energy.

Although I have added posts through 31 July (*), most of the recent information on this page has not been properly classified. It can be found in or by using the new WAIS Search of my entire site. If you're looking for posts on a specific topic, I strongly urge you to check out the WAIS search, since right now the posts are very poorly organized (more or less in the order in which they arrived here).

(*) Note that this is when they got to my site; my news suffers from about a four day lag time.

This home page is a mini-archive of information about the Scientology religion (or cult) that has piqued my interest. Who are these people, who want to harass everyone in sight who talks of "Marcabs" and "Body Thetans"?

What do they really believe?

Like virtually every document on the Web, this web page is constantly under construction. Pardon our dust.

I have finally written an automated program to help me update the post archive. As a result, more frequent updates should occur from now on, and I anticipate that the archive will be once again up to date soon. Unfortunately, I also have been horribly busy, so this might not be as soon as I would like. In the mean time, there are a whole bunch of new posts at the end of the file that I have not yet managed to classify.

Do a google search on this site!

Boy is this site BIG! I mean, there's well over 5MB of stuff, going on 6, available here. How do you find out what you want to read?

Well, you could look through the page and read things that catch your eye, or you could use the search below to find what you're seeking, fast.

Google
 

Like this page? Hate it? Please drop me a line!

I'd like to hear from you! Please let me know what you think of this page, whether you like it or hate it, and whether you plan to return.

If you're in the Players FAQ, or if I left you out, I'd like to know more about you - how you got into Scientology, how you got out (if you did), etc. I'd like to beef up the FAQ with more information about you.

Obviously all the information you give me for publication is public, and I'm sure the CoS will be anxiously reading this page. (That's part of the fun of this, of course!). So don't tell us anything you wouldn't mind the CoS knowing too. But if you're willing to share, I think it will add a little colour to the FAQ, especially if you're not covered extensively.

Click here to send me a comment

A word from your sponsor

This site is created and sponsored by David H Dennis, owner and system administrator of David's Amazing Internet Services. Follow the David's Amazing Internet link for information on my system, services and various FAQs that I've written about Internet providers and marketing on the Internet.

The move of this site to a new Internet address, announced previously, has been postponed, probably to early August. I will keep ars posted when I have an approximate installation date for the new system.

My statement about the anti-Scientology bias of this page

Why is this page anti-Scientology?

Because the pro-Scientology posters are lousy writers with no sense of humour whatsoever! At the bottom of this page, you can read my announcement to Scientology posters, asking for high-quality posts to include here.

Like most challenges to pro-Scientologists, it has had no effect whatsoever. Yet, anyway.

For more information about home page bias, see The Sloth's Statement on this subject.

Scientology-Oriented Home Pages

Operation Clambake, one of the most comprehensive and long-running anti-Scientology web sites.

Deirdre has an interesting anti-Scientology page, with a lot of fascinating information on Earthlink [Added 20 February 1996]

Ron Newman's Scientology and the Net web page came out at about the same time as mine, and is still an important historical account of those years. Here's his anti-CoS leaflet that he's been distributing in Boston.

Modemac used to have an excellent anti-CoS home page; unfortunately, it is now down due to his fears of CoS related legal problems. Here's a key quote from it to remember: "But if you ask about Scientology anywhere on the Internet, you are likely to be answered by statements of distrust, skepticism and suspicion ..."

For an excellent source for general information on Scientology, The Sloth's page

For another fine source of general information, check out Tilman Hausherr's home page.

Steve Marinick's article, Johnny Get Your Modem: Scientology's War with the Internet is an excellent summary of the situation.

For the real hard information, such as the affidavits and such, check out my copy of the FactNet WWW kit, containing the complete list of FactNet legal documents and information.

Tilman Hausherr found an article on Hubbard's Days at Caltech

The Total Freedom Trap, by Jon Atack, is an excellent introduction to Scientology.

L Ron Hubbard Biographies

Due to the Church's tiresome legal attacks, it's very difficult to keep biographies of its founder in print. Because of this, there are a number of free Hubbard biographies floating around the Web.

L Ron Hubbard: Messiah or Madman, perhaps the most absorbing of the Hubbard biographies.

Bare-faced Messiah, a complete biography of L Ron Hubbard, available free online. Compelling reading.

Miscellaneous

Woody has finally seen the light! His message listing the CAN Reform Group Home Page led me to an actual Pro-Scientology Home Page by Leisa Goodman. (I'm almost sure he didn't want anyone to notice!) "This page will expand," quoth Leisa, in a positively eerie imitation of Woody.

Perhaps the funniest thing about the CoS WWW pages is their obscurity. If you tried http://www.theta.com/, there's basically nothing there; it appears to be a dead-end, with only a couple of dull-looking links. Strange. It's almost as though they wanted to limit people's access to their pages. Well, pity for them: Woody has spilled the beans.

Since I wrote this, they appear to have finally cleaned up their act; Leisa Goodman's home page is now directly accessible from the root, although it is still her "personal" page and not an official product of the Church, even though 99% of its content is other official products of the Church.

Some Eccentric Scientology Web Sites

Recently, a few ars readers have created sites that give very little information on Scientology, but still are part of the ars phenomenon. Don't expect to hear much about Scientology here; expect to laugh and have fun.

Want an ARS T-Shirt?

Check out The Church of Sociology, an intriguing alternative to Scientology.

If you are a fan of Magic: The Gathering-style cards, check out ARS : The Clearing, part of the Illuminati: New World Order game from Steve Jackson Games.

The Clammer Kill Counts are now archived, for people who want to check out the count's complete history.

Erlich Case Information, including vital court documents

Alerma posts two sets of documents in the Erlich case. Part 1 contains a general review of the rather cloudy copyright situation, while Part 2 gives details. I strongly recommend that you check out part 1, which contains some rather fascinating information. Part 2 is supporting documentation for part 1, listing the documents studied in detail; it's somewhat heavy going. I did not include part 3, which was a list of every document ever filed in the Erlich case; I felt it was too boring for my loyal readers. If you want more after reading this, be sure to check out the Electronic Frontier Foundation's document archive, which can be found via Ron Newman's web page, above.

The Best of Dennis Erlich

Here is a sampling of classic Demmis Erlich posts.Bus Crash, the beginning and (possible) end of the Crosstown Bus to Total Freedom [tm]

The Body Raisins: Herber Jentzsch loses it on the air

A fascinating account of The Death of Quentin Hubbard, L Ron's unhappy son.

Ever wonder how the various Magical OT Powers worked? Read this post from Dennis

Here's the current Erlich Case status from Dennis himself, and here is some of his angst

Dennis' friend goes larking and finds himself in a tight spot indeed.

Check out Elizabeth McCoy (everyone's favourite Scientologist; no joke!) versus Dennis Erlich. In informing-beth.html Dennis takes on Elizabeth's take on the Church

The Dennis Overflow Page contains additional posts by Dennis which are not classics, but are still of interest to Dennis and CoS watchers.

Scientology IRC Wars

One of the stranger wars between the Church of Scientology and its opponents involves the Internet Relay Chat (IRC) service. Some anti-CoS people created the channel #clambake, to provide a place for free discussion on Scientology.

coriez@ix.netcom.com (Charles Oriez) announces the clambake as a regular feature.

Then, some rather immature (well, it fits IRC) pro-Scientology people took over the channel. Their main representative installed an interesting set of rules.

Response from the antis was swift.

nat@zumdick.rhein-main.de (Nat!) reports that the official CoS IRC channel is called Clambake! Doesn't make much sense now, does it?

Zane Thomas <zthomas@igc.apc.org> summarizes the odd situation surrounding Clambake and Clambake II. More wins for Scientology!

alan@abigail.drink.com (Alan Barclay) shares the clambake ban list with us - it contains just about everyone of merit on ARS!

jcblal@clark.net (J C Blalock) has some comments on Jet's rather odd Clambake channel rules.

Andy Lerma Raid Information

Andy Lerma (alerma) was just raided by the clams today (12 August 1995). Details for a defence fund are still being worked out. Click here for a cleaned up transcript of the announcement on IRC; for the unvarnished original.

Post Archive

The Post Archive is created from various messages on ars that I considered either funny or shocking enough to be worth preserving. Due to the large volume of messages, this is by nature extremely selective; please don't be offended if none of your messages have (yet) made it here.

As far as I know, this archive is the best way to get some of the wierd and wonderful ARS humour that has been posted. It's also a fine place for reading people's serious speculation on the Church and its actions.

Because this section has gotten very long, I have split it into sections.

Post Archive Contents

The Cerberus Archive contains perhaps the funniest and best-reasoned posts I've read on ARS. A must see!

These are some rare posts: Pro-Scientology posts that included a healthy spark of intelligence.

Meet Koos Nolst Trenite, a genuinely nice Scientologist. Most people consider him utterly deranged, but nice. Really! And in many cases, surprisingly enough, defrocked clam Koos presents the pro-Scientology case far better than the actual clams. This section also contains many hilarious Koos parodies, including the infamous Pantie Inspector and others.

The Church has had some interesting media coverage of late. Check out the Reviews by ARS posters, including where to find transcripts. The new highlight here is a courageous woman who infiltrated the CoS for a story! What a gal. This section also includes information on the CoS PR organ Freedom magazine's special edition on the Net, as well as 'The Net' and the Donahue show. [Last updated 23 July 1995]

Here's some information on the effects of the Church of Scientology versus the Internet wars. [Last updated 23 July 1995]

Meet Woody, aka Rick Sherwood, tireless Church of Scientology poster bee. What would we do without him? How can we resist his amazing writing style and spare economy of thought? The Woody Archive shows the best responses to Woody I could find. Funny stuff! [Last update: 23 July 1995]. Also, read about The Future of the Internet According to Woody. Scary stuff. :-(

Note: The Woody Archive also contains other classic spam-clams, such as Tom Lasher and friends.

Check out the bizarre misadventures and strange deeds of L Ron Hubbard and his fellow Sea Org members, .

Here's a massive archive of great ARS jokes and comic relief. How is Scientology doing? Check out these lists of Scientology corporations, both in trouble and out.

Let's take a peek into the curious world of Scientology-led businesses and see what it might be like if you were so unfortunate as to be hired by a business influenced by Scientology organizations.

Here's a grab bag of interesting articles that didn't fit into the other categories. Most of these are more serious in tone than the other posts in this archive.

New Additions are made to the archive every 2-3 days, depending on how much time I have to read ars. Usually, they will stay in this section for a while before I get around to classifying them.