RU-486 'Connie to "Bob's" Inspector'

Subject: Message From LRH in Escape Craft LEXUS

RU-486 'Connie to "Bob's" Inspector'

from "Bob's" Inspector - these are the TRUE WORDS of the PROPHET

Message # YRU-STU-0877-PID for Internet

To: All SubGenii

LRH on 6 Jan 1995, 6:66 GMT:

"BOB", CONTINUE TO BE MY COMMUNICATOR!"

(Ron communicates from one of the two other Galaxies
which Ron operates in,
space wide, extending to our Earth Galaxy via his celluar
phone in his LEXUS.)

"Continue to communicate the Truth about Rich Sherwood and Andy Milne they are LIARS, and always have been liars, they will be run over by the Great JHVH-1 in his LEXUS. They are not worthy to receive the implant. Kill them or KILL ME!"

"But, LRH, you are spreading hate and violence on the internet..."

"Goddamit, get me another scotch and soda....!"

L. Ron, was always a boozer, but now broke and penniless, parked outside of a run-down sleazy restaurant in near Alpha Centauri, he couldn't care less. "Dammit," he said to himself. At least the cellar phone still worked. Now only if he could stop the ringing in his ears to subside --- crashing into a planet with his LEXUS wasn't such a good idea. He was tired of being head honcho, sick of giving decrees from behind the wheel of his LEXUS, traveling to distant planets, eating at greasy diners and living out of a suitcase, he longed for a place to hang his hat, he longed for an EMPIRE.

"Be, what you are
Thine own LEXUS
which orbit the stars
my Inspector, that is, "Bob's" Inspector,
which I appreciate and agree to,
for which you do not need my agreement.

"Such is your fear and loathing in Las Vegas."

Nobody would buy Ron's books anymore, it just didn't play to Alien audiences, and they've never even heard of clams before (now what was a claim again, Ron?). The distant galaxies were a tough sell, Ron sat in his LEXUS, the car of the Gods, and thought perhaps he could get his own cable access TV show ---- stardom, my name in lights --- fame. "I know," Ron shouted to himself in the LEXUS, "I need an agent! a talent agency to get bookings, appearances on Late Nite TV, yeah that sort of thing."

Just then the phone rang. It was Richard Nixon. Ron decided to answer the cellular. "President Nixon, how is the afterlife," he politely asked the former president. Nixon reflected, "I had to lie a little and use fake address but I'm living over in Andromeda galaxy now and I'm WRITING ANOTHER BOOK. I'm going to have my own TALK RADIO show, Ron. I feel it all over again. Like a new lease on life." President Nixon's firm resolve left Ron feeling like a deposed dictator, stateless, or like Elvis, bloated reeling with no fans and no admirers. "Mr. President, help me stage a comeback," Ron pleaded. "Well Ron, you know it won't be easy." "I need an agent, Mr. President --- I need lights, camera, the stage, I feel... I feel...." "Like you need to win a little in life Ron?" "Yes, Mr. President, I can barely afford the payments on my LEXUS, goddamit, life sucks."

"Well, Ron, I'll see what I can do..."

"Residuals Mr. President, I WANT RESIDUALS!" "Money, cash, a little change in my pocket --- money from the FAITHFUL"

"Ron, there is only one man that can help you now, there is only one man that can save you and that man is J.R. "Bob" Dobbs!

"Lee will guide you to the place...."

"<gasp> Oswald?"

"Yes. you should know about our LHO, why he's our TOP SALESMAN"

"Mr. President, when should I meet, you, or Lee, or what about.."

"The re-auditing? You will have first become "born-again" and then "re-killed" in "Bob." "

"Oswald will have you bring some curtain rods wrapped in a paper bag, bring that to Dealey Plaza and meet us on the 6th floor of the Book Depository"

<Explosion, gun-fire, panic>

The newspaper headline read: "L. RON SHOT IN DEALY PLAZA." Oswald drank his fresh-sqeezed orange juice, and winked at Marina, what a happy day, mission complete. "I must write everything down, Marina, all the details, and tell the whole world how it happened."

A knock at the door, brought another figure, a man dressed in a 1960's suit, black. It was a man from S.L.A.K., a courier to pick up Oswald`s report. As he picked up the report, the the S.L.A.K. agent turned to leave as Oswald said, "tell "Bob" to send me that LEXUS."

"Yes, Mr. Oswald"

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